WELL….

So how did it go?  I’m sure you’ve asked someone that question following a meeting they attended.  Perhaps they had been on an interview or met with a prospect.

The unfortunate part of the question can frequently be the response. Too often the reply is “I don’t know,” or “I’m not sure.”

Maybe it even happened to you.  I know it happened to me.  But that was a long time ago, and after I finally “got it,” I promised myself, never again.

What I “got” was to never leave a meeting without knowing what the next steps will be.  If it’s not clear, then I’ll ask.  I’ll even let the other party know that if I don’t hear from them within a few weeks, that I will check back.  And I will.

It’s up to us to get the information we need.  Don’t be afraid to ask.  Think of it this way, if you leave a meeting not knowing the outcome or the next steps then you wasted your time.

Try it, see how it works and when I ask, “how did it go,” you’ll know just what to say

SELF-TALK

I received a number of emails following last week’s blog on optimism. Everyone I heard from agreed with how a positive attitude contributes to success.

Following up on the subject, I’d like to share a few more thoughts.

We often don’t pay attention to our internal conversations. These “self-talks” go on throughout the day and become the background noise that influences everything we do.   When I hear negative talk from a client, I will ask them what conversation they are having with themselves. And for some, that question becomes a wake up call.

Whatever we tell ourselves becomes true, whether it’s true or not. If we believe that we can’t do something, then we can’t.  And if we believe we can, we will.  It might take a little longer or look, feel, sound or smell a little different from what we originally imagined, but we will achieve our goal.

If we believe that we get the short end of the stick, we get pushed to the back of the line or we never win, I can promise that we’ll just get more of the same. On the other hand if we stay with our vision and persist in moving forward without taking our eye off of what we want, we will achieve our goal.

Start listening to the internal conversations you’re having with yourself.  Are they positive or are they negative? Are they helping you move forward or are they holding you back?

Feel free to send me an email if you need help in changing your self-talk.

You Can or You Can’t…It’s Up to You

It wasn’t too long ago that a company asked me to work with one of their senior level employees who often approached situations and challenges in a negative manner.  She seemed to find reasons why something couldn’t be done rather than why it could be done.  It was hurting her career.

There is a dramatic difference between people who react to roadblocks with a sense of futility and pessimism and those who react with determination and optimism.

Most business leaders are inspired by a sense of optimism.  Personally, of the people that I coach, the ones who succeed most often display a sense of realistic optimism.  They are grounded in reality, but see things in a positive light.  Their setbacks are temporary, impersonal, and challenges to be overcome.

Those who learn to be optimistic about life and work are far more likely to be successful than those who view events through a negative lens.  Being optimistic doesn’t mean ignoring reality or the hardships required to get great results.  Positive people can define a reality, yet defy a negative verdict.  By being optimists, leaders give people the hope, energy and strength needed to carry on.

Optimism, and a vision for what’s possible, supplies the energy to keep going, persist through challenges and come out on the other side.

Envision the Future…Where Are You Going?

A Note from Linda…

When I’m coaching with a client, we look at ways to expand leadership qualities. Often a client will want to develop an ability to see the bigger picture and become more future-focused.  Some people are naturally predisposed with a future-orientation, but even if you’re not, you can still learn to expand this skill.

Research tells us that of all the ideal leadership qualities, the ability to look forward is second only to honesty as the most admired trait. Focusing on the future sets leaders and aspiring leaders apart.  The capacity to imagine and articulate exciting future possibilities is a defining competency.

It’s important that we all make the time to hone our leadership effectiveness and expand our ability to become more future-oriented.

So my question is, “what are you doing to become more forward-thinking?”

Linda Yaffe
Certified Executive Coach

QUOTE:

When it comes to the future, there are three kinds of people: those who let it happen, those who make it happen, and those who wonder what happened.
John M. Richardson, Jr.

ENVISION THE FUTURE…WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

What single quality differentiates high-potential leaders from ordinary contributors in an organization?

It’s their ability to be able to see the bigger picture and focus on the future.

On average, 70 percent of workers worldwide select “forward-looking” as a key leadership competency. Think about the leaders you’ve followed or admired. The great ones are visionaries who serve as custodians of the future.

“As we age, gain more experience and move up the organizational hierarchy, our desire for a forward-looking leader increases,” say leadership professors, Barry Posner and Jim Kouzes. While only about one-third of undergraduate college students ranked “forward-looking” among their most important leadership attributes, more than 90 percent of senior executives added it to their lists.

While the ability to focus on the future separates leaders from the rank-and-file, many of us fail to understand and appreciate its importance. We devote almost no time to developing this vital quality, which then becomes a huge barrier to future success.

The challenge of being forward-looking escalates with each managerial level. Front-line supervisors are expected to anticipate events a few months ahead. Mid-level managers have timelines for more complex projects and need to look a few years into the future. Those in the executive suites must focus on goals that are often 10+ years away.

Do you look beyond what’s in front of you — especially when daily tasks take up so much time and energy?

How to Develop Future Focus

Carve out some time each week to peer into the distance and imagine what may be out there.

Start with 30 minutes a day, using the time to learn about what’s going on in your industry, with customers, with the potential future of your products and services. You can read magazines, books and/or online research.

Top executives estimate they spend only about 3 percent of their time thinking about, and getting others on board with, the critical issues that will shape their business 10 or more years down the road. It’s simply not enough time.

Sparking Energy for What Really Matters

In tough economic times, everyone hunkers down on tactics. They focus on survival and results. Decisions become pragmatic. After a while, however, this short-term approach grinds us down, and we lose sight of the big picture.

In today’s difficult times, people need to be reminded of why they are doing what they do — and why it matters. This is when leaders can step up and make a difference. Leadership is more than encouraging high-performance; it’s about reminding people of what they are trying to build and why it matters.

In many ways, leadership supplies oxygen to keep the fires going. When people are mired in day-to-day work details, they can lose their bearings. An effective leader makes a difference by helping people see their role in building a better future.

Growing Your Future-Focus

Here is an exercise that you can try. While it will help you connect your past experiences and values with your current work, it will also enable you to become more future oriented. The fact is, when you look backward, you can see farther ahead and imagine future possibilities.

Look for repeating themes in your life — the recurring messages that keep reminding you of what matters most. For younger leaders, there’s less past to recall; however, it’s still important to use the richness of your life experiences to uncover ideals.

Here are some questions to explore:

•    Identify the recurring theme in your life.

•    To which topic do you return again and again?

•    What story do you keep telling and retelling?

Search your past to find the theme. It will probably form the basis of your core values and higher purpose. When you know more about yourself, your dreams and your purpose, it will be easier to keep this information in mind each time you visualize the future.

Outsight: Imagine the Possibilities

To be a credible leader, you need to spend more time reading, thinking and talking about long-term possibilities. Develop the discipline to spend more time studying the future.

Establish a “future committee” dedicated to collecting ideas, articles, information and resources about trends affecting your organization. Track publications, both online and off. Circulate these ideas to stimulate discussions and innovative thinking.

To become a better leader or distinguish yourself as someone primed for promotion, you’ll want to develop your capacity to envision the future.

You’ll have to be able to answer the question, “Where are we going?”

TAKING OWNERSHIP

I can’t count the number of times I’ve been asked “what does it take to become a leader?”  While it takes many competencies to become a leader, one that stands out for me is “ownership.”

I believe that leadership begins with taking ownership.

When it comes to accountability around ownership, it’s never about handing something off as another person’s problem. Nor is it about blaming someone else. A strong leader owns the job, situation, challenge or project.  It belongs to them from beginning to end, regardless if they have assigned tasks to others or shared the responsibility with someone else.

When you own something it excels your performance and often the results. Taking ownership is empowering.

What do you think it takes to become a leader?  Send me an email and write BLOG in the subject line.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

I just received my holiday present today. It’s taken 3 weeks, 2 days and 14 hours to get my computer working right again.  I originally called for help because my PC stopped syncing with my ipad and iphone. And all went downhill from there.

This is the best present I could receive!

My warmest and best wishes to you for a wonderful holiday season and a healthy and happy New Year.  May 2012 bring you success, well-being and prosperity.

THE COMPUTER ISSUE FROM HELL…

I feel like I’ve been missing in action when it comes to keeping up with my blog. For the past 9 days I have been consumed with a computer issue. What I thought was a relatively easy problem to solve has gone from bad to worse. It all began when out of the blue I was not able to sync my PC with my iphone or ipad.

Doesn’t sound all that bad does it?  Well, it has turned into the Computer Issue from Hell.  Now not only can’t I sync my devices, I now have also lost ALL my data on both my cell and ipad. Did I mention that both are essential in conducting my business and living my life?

After working for 2 days with 2 different Apple tech support people, they informed me that my problem was beyond their scope. Not encouraging news is it?  They told me I needed to work with my technicians. My technicians?  So I went out and signed an agreement with a tech support company that has now been working my problem for a full week.

You can congratulate me. As of today, I have graduated.  Yes, I have now been assigned to a Tier 3 Level Support person (there were 3 other lower level technicians before him not counting the 2 Apple guys). Working on the problem requires the techs to take over my computer, my iphone and sometimes my land line as well. So in between meeting with clients, I’m staring at my screen talking with the techs as they explore different solutions. This has been going on every day for over a week.  In other words, this ordeal has rendered me totally incapable of getting all my work done. UGH!

If you know anyone who is doing research on how technology challenges can impact your patience, perseverance and escalate your stress level, please have them call me. I’m happy to be interviewed.

I do like to give credit where credit is due.  The tech support company I hired is stellar at being accountable, responsible and tenacious in solving my problem. Actually I’ve been amazed with their work ethic.

My new Tier 3 Level Support guy will be calling me shortly. He tells me that he can fix the problem.  Let’s hope so.

Tell Me a Story, Please

A Note From Linda…

It happens to me almost every time.  When I listen to a presentation in which the speaker is using hard facts such as dates and numbers to get their message across, (even if I can stay awake) it’s not too long before I forget what I had learned. I have a strong feeling that I’m not alone here.

Conversely when someone presents their information through storytelling, not only do I feel engaged in their presentation, but what I learned stays with me a long time. Sometimes forever.

Stories are powerful. They can influence and motivate others to a new level. Strong leaders know this and use stories to share their vision and sell their ideas.

When was the last time you were captivated by a good story?

My Best,

Linda Yaffe
Certified Executive Coach

 

Over the years I have become convinced that we learn best—and change—from hearing stories that strike a chord within us…Those in leadership positions who fail to grasp or use the power of stories risk failure for their companies and for themselves.”
— John Kotter, Harvard Business School professor, and author Leading Change

 

Tell Me a Story, Please

Some executives have a knack for telling stories that explain in vivid terms a concept. If you don’t have that natural talent, you can learn to use stories in a way that’s effective.
Here’s why it’s so important.

The art of crafting and telling a good story is a key element of leadership communications and a vital part of building executive presence. Cold, hard facts don’t inspire people to change. Straightforward analysis doesn’t excite anyone about a goal.

Let me give you an example. Last week my client, a CEO, was about to deliver a presentation to his people. At issue was a new concept and focus for the company that would affect how his people conducted their business. He wanted their buy-in. While his presentation was loaded with research and facts, I asked him to put it into story form. He ended up getting all that he wanted, and inspired the support of his team members.

Effective leadership requires stories that fire imaginations and stir souls. Stories are how we learn best. We quickly process information when it’s delivered in the form of a story, and we personalize it when we relate it to our own similar experiences.

General Electric’s Jack Welch excelled at this skill as do many other successful leaders. They know how to motivate by engaging people’s emotions through storytelling.

A narrative magnetically and biochemically draws audiences into the process, compelling them to visualize the picture you’re painting with your words. Stories help your staff make the connections among theory, facts, real life and real people.

Consider the following story options:
•    A negative story, a failure, a lesson learned
•    A success story, especially in the face of difficulties
•    A case study
•    A vision story
•    Why I am here story
•    Use of history and mythology
•    A deeply personal story (a tragedy or rags-to-riches example)

Our minds are hard-wired to pay attention to stories. We’ve been communicating through story telling since the caveman. When crafting a story, include as many specific details as possible to make it real to your audience. Be brief, and get to the point. Understatement often carries a bigger impact. Transport the listener by describing events in emotional terms. Keep it simple. Learn to use metaphors and analogies to summarize. Personalize your story with names, even if they need to be altered.

There’s no doubt that stories can change the way people think, act and feel. The more authentic your examples are, the more your stories will resonate with people. In real life, nothing is black or white. Real life is full of paradoxes and uncertainties. Tell your stories to make a point and deliver a lesson that has true value.

The best start to becoming a storyteller is to practice.  Know your audience so that your story will resonate with them and remember to be authentic and to speak from your heart.

GAINING BUSINESS ACUMEN

As you might have guessed, I’m a very strong proponent of social and emotional intelligence. I often say that it’s not always about how smart, bright and quick you are that will move you forward, but rather it’s about how well you communicate, relate and interact with others that make you stand out.

That being said, to move ahead in your career it is expected that you be competent in your job responsibilities, the business and your industry.  In other words you need to learn what is going on from a wide lens prospective.  Without this knowledge, your contributions will be limited.

There are several remedies that can help you gain the knowledge and insight to see the bigger picture. Here are a few recommendations to get you started:

•    Read journals and periodicals that speak to your business and industry
•    Join and participate in trade associations that speak to your business and industry
•    Read books that will help you be more business savvy
•    Learn how to navigate the workplace environment by having a mentor or coach
•    Network up both internally and externally with people in your business and industry

And of course there are plenty other remedies. I’d love to hear your recommendations. Please respond to me and write BLOG in the subject line.

HI THERE…

Has it ever happened that you ran into someone you know from prior meetings but when you went to greet them, they weren’t very approachable? Well it just happened to me. Happy to see this person, I approached them with a big smile and an extended hand. Their response however was what I call a bit “cool.” It sure wasn’t what I expected, and it took me back.

Approachability is a competency that speaks to our interpersonal skills and how well we relate to others.

Being open and friendly to others means putting people at ease so that connecting and communicating becomes easy. Approachable people are able to get more information, get it prior to others and are comfortable to be around. They create a total win for themselves.

Even if you believe it doesn’t always matter, how well we relate, communicate and interact with others will influence our success.

How do you rate yourself when it comes to being approachable?  I would love to hear from you. Write me back and type “BLOG” in the subject line.